Things Didn’t End that Way

A year ago I found myself in my dorm room writing this suicide note to my family and friends. No one knew the pain I felt and that I felt all alone. It seemed like everything I held dear was walking away from me without cause or explanation and I wanted to give up! People and school had become idols to me. More or less I had made them my God and as a result I was left in this dark place. Failing school and toiling over people who failed to be in my life like they promised they always would. Sometimes someone choosing to leave your life is a far greater pain than someone leaving your life through death.

In this place dark God had to show me that He was with me the entire time.

God’s strength is truly made perfect in our weakness. His strength is the only thing that kept me from giving up. It was His whisper of “Get up daughter! Give Me another try” that kept me from taking every pill I had access to. I had to learn , and am still learning , that trying to handle hard times by myself leads me nowhere but back to this place. However , when I allowed God to enter into my life and take control, the burdens I carried became much lighter! I’m not writing this to tell you that this year everything in my life has been perfect but I’m writing this to help someone who feels just like I did and sometimes still do. So to the person who is one trouble from ending it all… GET UP and give God another try. I know that at the end of the day you just want PEACE just like I did! You can find peace in God! I can’t promise you that everything in your life will be perfect but I can promise that whatever you face in life you will never have to face it alone.


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